Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice was presented the Best Non-Profit Organization of the Year Award at the Sussex County Chamber of Commerce “Toast to the Stars,” Awards dinner on Wednesday, May 9th.

The award was presented in recognition of outstanding accomplishments by a non-profit organization with a reputation for excellence within the non-profit community, as well as with the public at large.

Other nominees and award winners can be viewed here. Click here.

Newton, NJ – May 3, 2018. Subaru World of Newton presented $15,000 to Julia Quinlan, co-founder and chairman of Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice on Thursday, May 3, 2018 at the dealership showroom in Newton. Subaru World of Newton has proudly donated more than $65,000 to the Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice since 2015.

The donation was the result of the “Subaru Shares the Love” Campaign. Subaru of America, Inc. marked it’s 50^th Anniversary in the United States in 2017. And for the second year in a row, there was no cap on the total donation from Subaru of America to its Share the Love charitable partners.  2017 marked the tenth anniversary of the event.

From November 16, 2017 to January 2, 2018, Subaru donated $250 for every new Subaru vehicle sold or leased to the customer’s choice of a national charity or a pre-approved hometown charity. Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice was selected as the hometown charity to be the recipient of the annual campaign.

The initial check to the hospice was for $14,584. Wally Darwish, general manager and Donald Allen, district parts and service manager each added additional donations to surpass the original $15,000 fundraising goal. “We are about reaching goals at this dealership,” said Allen. “Goals of the families we serve in the community, our employees and charitable organizations.”

“Subaru World of Newton is a committed partner in the local community. Over the years, we’ve faithfully donated to local organizations, like the Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice, hosted pet adoptions, rain coat drives for Project Self Sufficiency and funded our local elementary school’s projects. Paying it forward is important to our dealership and we’re always looking to provide expert care and love to those we interact with every day,” said Darwish.

“We’ve been the proud recipient of the Subaru Stellar Care Award, now currently known as the Love Promise Award, twice for outstanding customer satisfaction driven by our remarkable sales and service teams,” said Michele Rygiel, district sales manager from Subaru Distributors Corporation.

“We are so thankful for the continued support of Subaru of Newton,” said Julia Quinlan. “There are so many families in the communities we serve that will benefit from this generosity.”

The Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice is a not-for-profit organization which provide a full continuum of high quality medical, emotional and spiritual services to individuals requiring hospice, family members and the community.

Wally Darwish, general Manager of Subaru World of Newton (front left) presents a check to Julia Quinlan as part of the Subaru Shares the Love annual charitable giving promotion as the staff of Subaru World of Newton and Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice join in the presentation.

Newton, NJ, May 1, 2018 — Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice has been named a 2018 Hospice Honors Elite recipient by HEALTHCAREfirst, the leading provider of Web-based home health and hospice software, billing and coding services, CAHPS surveys, and advanced analytics. Hospice Honors is a prestigious program that recognizes hospices providing the highest level of quality as measured from the caregiver’s point of view.

“We are excited to recognize the 2018 Hospice Honors recipients for their hard work and dedication to providing exceptional care,” said J. Kevin Porter of HEALTHCAREfirst. “I congratulate Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice on its success in achieving this highest of honors.”

Award criteria were based on Hospice CAHPS survey results for an evaluation period of October 2016 through September 2017. Award recipients were identified by evaluating performance on a set of 24 quality indicator measures. Performance scores were aggregated from all completed surveys and were compared on a question-by-question basis to a National Performance Score calculated from all partnering hospices contained in the HEALTHCAREfirst’s Hospice CAHPS database. Hospice Honors recipients include those hospices scoring above the HEALTHCAREfirst National Performance Score on 20 of the evaluated questions. HEALTHCAREfirst holds a special recognition, Hospice Honors Elite, to honor hospices scoring above the HEALTHCAREfirst National Performance Score on all 24 of the evaluated questions.  Please visit HEALTHCAREfirst’s website at www.healthcarefirst.com to learn more about HEALTHCAREfirst Hospice CAHPS survey program as well as the Hospice Honors awards.

About HEALTHCAREfirst

HEALTHCAREfirst provides Web-based technologies and services to improve business and clinical operations for over four thousand home health and hospice providers across the United States. Based in Springfield, MO and one of the fastest growing providers of its kind, the company provides agency and clinical management software, outsourced revenue cycle management services (billing, coding and OASIS Review), CAHPS surveys, and advanced analytics, in any combination. HEALTHCAREfirst’s breadth of solutions offers agencies a single source to improve patient care, create operational efficiencies, increase profitability, and simplify CMS compliance. With HEALTHCAREfirst, agencies can focus on patients instead of paperwork. 

The winning secret number from the 2018 Hospice Honors Banquet is 321. Please contact our office by Monday April 23, 5 pm, if you have the winning number. You can call 973-383-0115 ext. 145 to claim your prize of two tickets to the 2018 Wine and Cheese Festival. If no prize is claimed we will draw a different number.

2018 Hospice Honors Photo Gallery – Photos by Paul Wheeler

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Ribbon cutting ceremony at the grand opening of the new permanent home of the Joseph T. Quinlan Bereavement Center in April of 2017. Left to right: John Quinlan, Director of Development, Julia Quinlan, President of the Governing Board and co-founder; MaryEllen Quinlan, Vice-President of the Governing Board; Diana Sebzda, Director of Bereavement; Cecelia Clayton, Executive Director; Tammie Horsfield, President Sussex County Chamber of Commerce; Lorri Optiz, Bereavement Counselor, Tara Reyes, Bereavement Counselor and Nancy Moody, Bereavement Counselor.

The public is invited to attend an Open House to celebrate the one-year anniversary of the new permanent location of the Joseph T. Quinlan Bereavement Center. The open house will be held on Friday, April 20, 10 a.m. – 6:30 p.m., at the Bereavement Center located on 5 Plains Road in Augusta.

The Center exists for the community. Counselor help those who are finding it difficult to function because of the loss of a loved one find ways to cope.

The Joseph T. Quinlan Bereavement center has continuously served families in the community since 2000. Previously located on 61 Spring Street in Newton, the Center moved to its new, permanent location last April. The building on 5 Plains Road was purchased because of the generous support of the community. The Center also has satellite offices in Hackettstown and Milford, PA.

“Unfortunately, at some time in everyone’s life they will experience the loss of a loved one. The services offered by the staff and the Joseph T. Quinlan Bereavement Center truly help people find the road to recovery,” said Diana Sebzda, MA, LPC, FT, Director of Bereavement.

The centers currently offer group support meetings, anticipatory grief support counseling for families with a loved one who is dealing with a terminal illness, school bereavement support programs, memorial services, grief lecture series, children’s bereavement art programs, pet loss support groups and more.

“The Joseph T. Quinlan Bereavement Center is a sanctuary of safety. I felt unconditional acceptance and support and left feeling renewed and hopeful,” said Charles Stackhouse who received services from the Center.

We encourage those who have not stopped by for a visit in our new location to please consider it on Friday, April 20^th. There is no obligation, just stop by to chat with one of our counselors and take a tour. If you know someone in need of help, bring them so they can experience first-hand the warmth, compassion and professionalism of our staff with no pressure of commitment.

A free travel tumbler will be given to the first 40 guests to attend the Open House. For more information or to RSVP please call 973-948-2283.

Bereavement refers specifically to the process of recovering from the death of a loved one. Grief is a reaction to any form of loss. Both encompass a range of feelings from deep sadness to anger, and the process of adapting to a significant loss can vary dramatically from one person to another.

Everyone grieves in their own way and in their own time. Some people recover from grief and resume normal activities within six months, though they continue to feel moments of sadness. Others may feel better after about a year, and sometimes people continue to grieve for years without seeming to improve or find relief even temporarily. 

When a person’s grief-related thoughts, behaviors, or feelings are extremely distressing, unrelenting, or incite concern, a qualified mental health professional may be able to help.

A therapist might help the bereaved find different ways to maintain healthy connections with the deceased through memory, reflection, ritual, or dialogue about the deceased and with the deceased.

In addition to individual therapy, group therapy can be helpful for those who find solace in the reciprocal sharing of thoughts and feelings, and recovery results are often rapid in this setting. Similarly, family therapy may be suitable for a family whose members are struggling to adapt to the loss of a family member.

The Joseph T. Quinlan Bereavement Center offers grief support and counseling for both hospice families and anyone in the community. The professional and caring staff can bring comfort and understanding which will help you and your family through difficult times. The counselors at the center offer individual counseling and ongoing support groups.

The month of April marks the one-year anniversary of finding a permanent home for the Joseph T. Quinlan Bereavement Center on 5 Plains Road in Augusta. The Center also operates satellite offices in Hackettstown and Milford, PA.

If you know of anyone who could benefit from out services, please give them our phone number, 973-948-2283. One phone call can make the difference.

Cecelia Clayton, MPH, executive director at Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice will be presenting a 4-part lecture series for those living with grief. Pre-registration is required as walk-ins will not be accepted. You can learn more about the series and register online at KarenAnnQuinlanHospice.org/

Children who participated in the summer children’s art bereavement program made several crafts as they learned methods to cope with the loss of a loved one.

The effects of unresolved grief on children can be devastating. From a child’s perspective, the experience of loss is not only overwhelming emotionally, but affects cognitive functioning as well.

Young children may be unable to recognize or categorize their losses, let alone sort them one from another. They may receive unclear explanations or no information at all about why these losses have occurred.

Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice and the Joseph T. Quinlan Bereavement Center will host the Children’s Art Bereavement Program on Thursday evenings, 6 p.m. – 8 p.m., starting on March 8. This themed program is designed for children (age 6-12) who have experienced the loss of a loved one through death. This program will focus on meeting the individualized needs of grieving children through art and play.

This series also helps children understand their own unique feelings in grief, allows them to come together with others who have also experienced the loss of a loved one, and provides an environment where they feel comfortable asking questions and expressing their feelings and fears about death.

For the adults, a simultaneous group will be provided for the parents or guardians. This group will be educational and supportive in nature.  

Registration for this session is limited. Pre-registration is required and there is a $100.00 fee to help cover the cost of materials and supplies. Limited scholarships are available. Please call Diana Sebzda, Director of Bereavement for more information or to register at 973-948-2282 or email bereavement@karenannquinlanhospice.org.

The Long Goodbye: Coping With Sadness And Grief Before A Loved One Dies

Judith Graham

For years before her death at age 96, Nancy Lundebjerg’s mother underwent a long, slow decline.

Arthritis made it hard for Margaret Lundebjerg to get around. After two hip surgeries, she needed a walker when she was out and about.

Incontinence was a source of discomfort, as was the need to rely on aides to help her perform daily chores.

Little by little, Margaret became frail and isolated. “There was a sadness to seeing my mother’s circle of life become diminished,” said Nancy Lundebjerg, 58, CEO of the American Geriatrics Society, who wrote about her experiences in the organization’s journal.

The anguish accompanying aging isn’t openly discussed very often, nor is its companion: grief. Instead, these emotions are typically acknowledged only after a loved one’s death, when formal rituals recognizing a person’s passing —the wake, the funeral, the shiva — begin.

But frailty and serious illness can involve significant losses over an extended period of time, giving rise to sadness and grief for years.

The loss of independence may be marked by the need to use a walker or a wheelchair. The loss of a cherished role may dishearten an older woman who is no longer able to cook dinner for her extended family, gathered at the holidays. The loss of shared memories may be painful for adult children when their older father is diagnosed with dementia. And these are but a few examples.

Looming over everything is the loss of the future that an older adult and his or her family imagined they might have, often accompanied by anxiety and dread.

This pileup of complex emotions is known as “anticipatory loss.” “The deterioration of function, disability and suffering have their own grieving processes, but helping families deal with that isn’t built into the health care system,” said Dr. John Rolland, professor of psychiatry at Northwestern University’s Feinberg School of Medicine and author of “Families, Illness and Disability: An Integrative Treatment Model.”

Rolland and several other experts offered advice on how to deal with difficult emotions that can arise with frailty or serious illness:

Acknowledge Your Feelings

“Grief starts the moment someone with a serious illness receives the diagnosis,” said Tammy Brannen-Smith, director of grief and loss services at Pathways, a hospice in Fort Collins, Colo. But it doesn’t stop there. Each time a capacity is lost — for instance, an older adult’s ability to negotiate stairs, to drive or to manage household finances — sadness and grief can arise afresh. Brannen-Smith encourages people to acknowledge their feelings and try to “normalize them, because people don’t understand that everyone goes through this.”

Talk Openly

When families avoid talking about an aging parent’s frailty or serious illness, the person with the condition can become isolated and family relationships can become strained.

“My view is, you’re better off trying to get through whatever you’re facing together,” Rolland said.

When Rolland works with couples who are dealing with multiple sclerosis, for instance, he asks them to make a list of things they’d like to discuss but don’t. “Usually, there’s about a 75 percent overlap, and it’s a tremendous relief to most people to find out they don’t have to keep things locked up inside,” he said.

“People who are facing serious illness think about what might lie ahead all the time,” Rolland said. “For a family member not to bring this up, for everyone to be off in their own grieving pockets, alone, isn’t helpful.”

Communicate Sensitively

Abigail Levinson Marks, a clinical psychologist in San Francisco, regularly works with adults who have brain tumors, which can alter their thinking and wipe out their memories, as dementia does for millions of older adults.

“People with these conditions aren’t the same as they were before, but it would be heartbreaking for them to know that you didn’t see them as the same person,” she said. “So, the truth becomes something that cannot be named and that everybody avoids, for fear of shaming the person.”

In her practice, Marks asks “people to share what each person is going through and not worry about protecting each other from what they’re feeling,” she explained. “Because protecting each other leads to feeling more alone and magnifies the feelings of loss.”

For a caregiver of someone with dementia, that might mean saying,“Sometimes you might see a look crossing my face and think that I’m disappointed. It’s not that I’m upset with you. It’s that I’m sad that there are things that happened in our past that we don’t remember together.”

For someone who has suffered a stroke, it might mean encouraging them to open up about how hard it is to lose a measure of independence and be seen as someone who’s disabled.

Lean In

How people respond to sadness and grief varies, depending on their personality, past experiences, the relationship they have with the person who’s frail or ill, and the nature of that person’s condition.

“Sadness can make you cherish a person even more and appreciate small moments of connection,” said Barry Jacobs, a Pennsylvania psychologist and co-author of “AARP Meditations for Caregivers.”

Some people, however, can’t tolerate feeling this distress and end up distancing themselves from someone whose health is declining. Others might show up in person but focus on tasks instead of allowing themselves to connect emotionally.

If possible, lean in rather than letting yourself become distant. “Cherish the time that you have together,” Jacobs said. “Rather than pulling back, move toward the person and be as engaged with them as possible, particularly on an emotional level.” In the end, connection eases the pain of grief, and you’ll be glad you had this time with the person.

Seek Support

“Don’t confront grief alone or in isolation,” said Alan Wolfelt, founder and director of the Center for Loss & Life Transition in Fort Collins, Colo. “Have people around you who are supportive and who will be present for you” — family members, friends, people from a support group, whoever is willing to be a companion through your journey through serious illness.

Ultimately, this journey will help shape how you ultimately experience a loved one’s death.

Wolfelt describes mourning his mother twice. “The day she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and all the days I watched her dwindle. And then, the day she died, I had to begin mourning again, at a whole other level.”

But Lundebjerg of the American Geriatrics Society found a measure of peace when her mother finally passed away, after two seizures and the family’s decision not to pursue further treatment. “It was OK that she died because she was ready — she had made that very clear. And I had come to peace, over a very long time, with the fact that this was going to be coming.”

We’re eager to hear from readers about questions you’d like answered, problems you’ve been having with your care and advice you need in dealing with the health care system. Visit khn.org/columnists to submit your requests or tips.

On January 1, 2018, members of the Blue Knights Chapter IX motorcycle club rang in the new year by riding out in the annual Chilly Chili Run to benefit Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice.

Last year the Blue Knights donated more than $11,000 to the Hospice from the 2017 run. The donation was used to provide medical, emotional and spiritual support to people facing terminal illness. Karen Ann Quinlan Hospice make certain that their remaining days can be lived as fully as possible.

We would like to thank the Knights for helping us maintain this mission.